11/15

Sometimes people will make odd comments. Comments like, 'who would be next to me if I were in the hospital'. Or 'who would care if something happened to me'. I find comments like this really funny. Not because people care about who would be with them in hard times, but because for me, I already know. For me, I'm nothing for people to worry for. Say I was in the hospital, maybe I got hit by a car or something. No one would show up to see me. Not a damn soul. But you know what.? That's okay. Most people have no idea what I do in my life, because no one gives a damn. If that were to happen to me, the only person to be by my side would be my mother.

I wouldn't want anyone to worry for me. The funny thing.? Who the fuck would even know that something happened to me.? How would they even find out.? No one would have any idea. I'd be by myself, like always.


Maybe I do need some help.

I hate myself so much, I don't even know why.

Why can't I stop.?

Why can't I be fucking normal.?