You.

I just don't know anymore.

What should I say to you?

Should I say anything at all?

What would be the point.

I started talking to someone new, and I wonder if you would even care. At the same time, I don't care if you do or don't. Sometimes I just like to sit around and think. What if I never found out? What if we we're still together? It's been years, yet I still have these nightmares about what you've done to me. It makes me sick every time I hear your name. You're the reason why I have so many fucking relationship problems. The sad part is, I don't think you have any idea what you've done to me. I just don't understand how I can hate someone so much, but still miss them.

At the same time, I don't think its you that I miss. It might just be that I miss the cute relationship that we had back then. Everything else that I've had with people, hasn't been the same. I'm sure that's why none of these relationships that worked out. But I can't let this happen to me anymore. I still remember when you would hold me at night, I felt so safe. Now, whenever I close my eyes, I'm scared. The last thing that I want to do is die alone in this world.

I've found someone new, that I've started talking with. I like them a lot. Even the smallest of hugs can make me smile, just like before. I just don't know what to do about it.

I hate being so awkward about things.

Let's just see what happens day by day.

I feel sick a lot as of late.

More like I'm about to be sick.

I shouldn't be.. but I'm not going to let it bother me.

I just needed to rant for a little bit.

I want Arianna to come home, so we can leave, and have a good night.

I need to see you.

ugh.